Fashion Faux Pas

Before Milt Schmidt became the first general manager of the Capitals, he played and coached with the Bruins.

Schmidt remembered his goalies saying that Bruin defenders' black pants made it hard to locate the puck.

Milt put that tidbit to use for his new team's uniform. The Capitals skated into Madison Square Garden for their first-ever game sporting white pants.




That's Milt at left in this 1974 team photo-op, gesturing to his tailor for some last-minute alterations.

Unfortunately, white pants proved an off-color choice. Why? Because...

White shows stains, duh, and...
When wet, they show what's underneath, and...
Reasons 1 and 2 made them laughably silly, hardly the competitive advantage they were designed for.

Oh, about that competition: The first-year Capitals won just one of 40 road games, and this January, 1975 cover of the NHL's "Goal" magazine reveals a clue as to why.

The players apparently skated hunched over during road contests, in a desperate attempt to hide the white shorts.

As goalie Ron Low told Evan Weiner of nhl.com, "It was a joke. The pads get rubbed against the boards and it gets really filthy. After 10 games you couldn't tell if it was white or not anyway.”

So new blue duds were hastily ordered. The NHL even overlooked its own rules to authorize an in-season change.

The kicker: the team swiched pants color again in 1995, to... wait for it... Black! We're guessing Milt was not consulted.

King of the Cowboys Practices Hockey Schitck

Capitals All-Star center Guy Charron gets together for a photo-op with movie cowboy Roy Rogers. See if you can guess the reason these two are sharing a laugh.

A. Roy's burger chain was a major advertiser with the Caps.

B. Roy has agreed to let players know they haven't made the team by singing "Happy Trails To You."

C. Guy has just told Roy that his restaurant's
Double-R-Bar Burger "Tastes like Trigger."

If you answered "A", you're correct. And if you answered "C", you should be ashamed of yourself.

Caps Cooked On Opening Night

Believe it or not, Redskins owner Jack Kent Cooke and coach George Allen conspired against the Capitals before their first-ever home game.

Cooke also owned the L.A. Kings, who would christen Capital Centre against the Caps on Oct. 15, 1974. Before the team bus left for the rink, Allen boarded to give the Kings a pep talk.

As Bob Miller recounts in Tales From The Kings, Allen clapped his hands as he talked. "Aware the Kings were unbeaten in 3 straight, Allen said, 'Remember men, four is better than three,' and then left the bus." Not exactly "Win one for the Gipper."

With that suspect motivation, L.A. and Washington slogged to a 1-1 tie. Five years later, a disenchanted Cooke sold the team, famously lamenting that transplanted Canadians didn't buy enough tickets to Kings games. "Now I know why they left Canada - they hate hockey!"

Picard Tries To Make Extra Dough

Anyone who thinks pre-season games never matter should have been in Quebec City on Oct. 10, 1977. 1st round draft choice Robert Picard, after signing with the Caps over the summer, had signed a second, higher-paying contract with the WHA Nordiques. Adding kerosene to the controversy, Picard announced, "I'd rather deliver pizzas in Quebec than play for Washington."

Soon after the WHA nullified the Nordiques contract, Picard appeared at Le Colisee in Quebec as a member of the Capitals. Knowing how surly the crowd would be about being spurned, Caps teammates teased Picard by avoiding him on the team bus. Sure enough, during warmups, a fan greeted him by throwing a pizza on the ice.

Quebec won the game 4-3 in overtime, before a crowd of more than 12,000. Picard finally wore a Nordiques sweater after they joined the NHL, playing there from 1985-90.

So That's Why The Sauna Smells Like Tomato Sauce

Too bad Caps goalie Mike Palmateer wasn't around that night in Quebec City. If someone had fired a slice in his direction, he'd probably have eaten it.

Defenseman Jim McTaggart gave the culinary details to the Post. "Mike told the training staff that he needed pepperoni pizza before each game.

"So they kept a stack of them in the equipment room and before the game would put one in the sauna and heat it for 30 minutes, then serve it to Mike."


PHOTO AT RIGHT:
Mike waits as grease stains are scrubbed from his sweater.

Foul Fowl

There really isn't anything I can add to embellish this photo of the Capitals first mascot - allegedly an eagle - named "Winger," who looked like the unfortunate cousin Big Bird wouldn't speak about.

We'll never know what Craig Berube was thinking as he's coming off the ice, under Winger's googly-eyed gaze. Maybe it's better that way.

After Winger was euthanized, the team's current mascot arrived.

Named Slapshot, he was "hatched" from inside an egg right on the rink during a 1995 game.

While an aesthetic improvement, it was a difficult birth.

"Inside the egg was pretty hot. And upon exiting it, the person inside the costume got dizzy and fell to the ice." St. Petersburg Times

This Duck Didn't Mind Being Shot At

The topic of strange birds must also include goalie Clint Malarchuk. Teammates named him "Mallard" because of in-game impressions of Donald Duck.

"He quacks between periods. Actually quacks," marveled defenseman Gary Galley to Sports Illustrated. Forward Greg Adams' take? "Clint Malarchuk is the mayor of Pluto."

The planets never fully aligned for Malarchuk in Washington. He did win 24 games, including four shutouts, in 1987-88, his only full season in D.C. But he faltered in the playoffs, and was dealt away the following season.

Bargain Bin

Remember when these "Washington Capitals Ms. Piggy" pins were flying off the shelves faster than stores could stock them?

No? Me either. Maybe fans were too busy snapping up these Washington Capitals Toothbrushes.

On the topic of collectibles, marvel at the clairvoyance inside the lid of one soda bottle.

The photographic evidence is undeniable. Back in 1980, a Canadian Pepsi bottler was first to forshadow Montreal defenseman Rod Langway as... a Cap.

(Do you suppose two summers later, after being named Capitals G.M., David Poile popped open this refreshing beverage, and got the inspiration to make the monumental trade that brought Langway to D.C.? No, I didn't think so.)

Here in the Internet age, posters can list their "status" on social networking sites.

Back in the '80's, the Caps offered this manual version in pin form. Denis Potvin has the puck? Set the Fun Meter to "Lo". Mike Gartner steals it and scores! Move that needle to "Hi"!

We can only conjecture why fans stopped wearing the pin. Perhaps their moms feared that too much touching their own Fun Button could make them go blind.

There Goes The Neighborhood

Throughout the '70's, as the Flyers and Canadiens battled for hockey supremacy, Bob Kelly and Pierre Bouchard staged many a bruising battle.

(This next paragraph should be read while humming the tune from "The Odd Couple.")

"In 1980, Bob Kelly was asked by Philadelphia to remove himself from his place of residence. With nowhere else to go, he appeared at the home of the Washington Capitals. A year earlier, Montreal had thrown Pierre Bouchard out, requesting that he never return. Can two relocated men share an ice surface without driving each other crazy?"

Kelly recalled the surreal arrangment in a chat with thehockeynews.com. "In 1980, I end up in Washington. Pierre Bouchard ends up in Washington. We end up in condos next to each other, three doors apart. One day he's playing with my kid."

Kelly smiles at the memory. "Something is wrong with this picture - five years ago he was beating the s--- out of me."

Penalty for Boarding (the Bus)

The Capitals suffered a glass-shattering hit during the 1976 season... and they weren't even playing hockey at the time.

As the team was returning from a road trip, a large-antlered deer started running alongside their bus. The deer then rammed the bus, shattering windows and ripping the fabric of a empty seat.

(No word on if it was a Milwaukee Buck looking for a ride into town to play the Bullets.)

The early Capitals often found getting to and from the rink as baffling as a Canadiens power play.

Like the time in 1975, when immigration almost denied coach Red Sullivan re-entry to the U.S., because he couldn't produce a green card.

"'I see they let you go,' a Washington Post reporter commented as Sullivan, coatless and snow covered, returned to the bus. 'Yes, darn it,' Sullivan replied." No wonder ulcers forced Red to resign after just 19 games behind the bench.

Ron Lalonde told McClatchy News, "You didn't know what to expect next. There was supposed to be a bus waiting for you at the hotel in Buffalo or somewhere, and there wouldn't be one. It was like a traveling circus."

And that was even before a deer joined the act.

The Plane Truth
Air transportation proved just as vexing for the players.

October 28, 1975 in Los Angeles. The Caps are outshot 40-16, Marcel Dionne scores a hat trick, and Washington loses, 6-0. For the flight to Kansas City, the cash-strapped Caps book the team in the very last rows of a commerical flight. The indignity got worse, as broadcaster Ron Weber remembered in his Hall of Fame induction speech.

"We had been booked in the ‘non food’ section. As they were bringing the food up that we were not to get, Ace Bailey says to the flight attendant, ‘Could you slow down please, so I can sniff it?’

"And then he goes up to Milt Schmidt, the general manager and says ‘Milt, do you know a good shoe store? I might need to get a comfortable pair of shoes because we might be standing up on the next trip."

P.S. The Capitals won their game in Kansas City, 6-2, behind Bernie Wolfe's 30 saves in his NHL debut. Perhaps the Caps were the "Hungrier" team?

Mark Spitz With A Microphone

As their play-by-play man, Ron Weber loved the Capitals. He just didn't trust them.

Specifically, he didn't trust them on road trips. See, Weber, who broadcast almost 2,000 Caps games, had heard about players pulling pranks at the team hotel - like kidnapping media types from their rooms, and locking them out in their underwear.

So Ron made a pre-emptive maneuver: he always slept in a bathing suit.

Speaking of Weber's attire, "Outrageously loud" was how Robert Fachet of the Washington Post described it.

As a sportscaster, "Weber needs little added color with his favorite ensemble of red jacket, red shirt, white tie, white pants, red socks, and white shoes."

Weber got the last word, though, saying on-air that Fachet "has been to too many somber affairs." Sitting nearby, Fachet roared with laughter that could be heard on the broadcast.

Bad Breaks

Seven years before the birth of the Capitals, Albert King recorded "Born Under a Bad Sign."

The blues standard could have served as the theme song for several of the expansion Caps, especially the signature line: "If it wasn't for bad luck, I wouldn't have no luck at all."

In Gordie Brooks' case, the bad luck came when he least expected it. From the Orlando Sentinel: "During warmups, Brooks skated in on Ron Low, and unleashed a routine shot.

"The puck caromed off Low's skate and into Brooks' face, and Brooks would eventually require reconstructive surgery."

Gord played another decade in the minors, but never again in the NHL.

In the 1976-77 season, Bob Sirois could have used his own medical clinic. And talk about a Bad Sign. "On the first day of training camp," reported the AP, "he leaned back while watching teammates run - and cut his hand on a piece of glass."

Bob never did stop singing the blues. In September, Sirois strained knee ligaments. In December, he broke his left thumb. In February, a violent check into the boards put his right arm in a sling.

Oh, and did we mention his bout with food poisoning?


For sheer volume, nothing matched a January, 1981 road trip through Western Canada. The Caps were chased by an injury bug the size of Mothra.

Both starting goalies (Mike Palmateer and Wayne Stevenson), were sidelined.

One starting center (Rolf Edberg) and 5 of the top 6 defensemen (Pat Ribble, Rick Smith, Pierre Bouchard, Paul MacKinnon and Yvon Labre) were unable to suit up. And the only “healthy” D-man, Rick Green, played with stomach cramps!

Olie Shows Off His Buns

Longtime goalie Olaf Kolzig began his NHL career in 1989 in the old red, white and blue. In fact, he played his first game for the Capitals when he was just 19.

In those early days, Olie apparently ate his postgame meal on the ice while still in uniform.

Other disturbing issues raised by this hockey card:

Kolzig's tribute-to-Elvis hairdo...
The creepy fish-eye lens...
And why is his name, "Olaf", spelled out in mustard?

The people who brought you Woodward and Bernstein decided to train their investigative lens on this mystery. The Post article left no pun unturned:

"Frankly... card is a wiener."
"Athletes are hot dogs."
"Plays with lots of mustard."
"Relishing the feeling."
"Every hot dog has his day."

There's more, but since you're probably starting to gag, let's just say the article was the wurst.

Doors, Doctors, and Tricky Dick

These orphan items didn't merit stand-alone entries. But throw them together, and you’ve got the only post anywhere that includes a rock group, a witch doctor, and a President – all Caps-related!

Before hitting the ice during the 1983-84 season, Dave Christian performed an unusual pregame assignment. He pushed the play button on a cassette recorder, as the team got revved up by listening to “Break On Through” by The Doors. Strange Days, weren't they?

Capitals owner Abe Pollin once speculated on the reason behind the team’s bad luck. “Maybe the Capitals were cursed by some voodoo doctor from Saskatoon.”

According to the Washington Post, guess who helped secure an NHL franchise for the Nation’s Capital: President Richard Nixon, in 1972. (Maybe that was the curse.) Then again...

NBC broadcaster Mike Emrick heard it differently: "Nixon lobbied for another city other than Washington to get a franchise. History does not record who the President got involved for. The Caps were discourged that the guy who lived in town wasn't going to help them."

Stories collected from:
Washington Post, washingtoncaps.com, The Argus-Press, Montreal Gazette.

Of all the Capitals photos I've run across, this group seems most in screaming need of explanation.

At left, Boston's Terry O'Reilly is astride Yvon Labre like a hobby horse.

Yvon, who learned to put up with a lot during the first seven Capitals seasons, seems patient in wating for Terry to finish his ride. He also appears ready to use the stick he's holding to perform an emergency appendectomy, should O'Reilly linger too long.

At right, Mark Lofthouse, unquestionably the most patriotic Capital. Before a faceoff, he often recited the Pledge of Allegiance. All the more impressive, because Mark is Canadian.

At far left is goalie Ron Low, although it looks like he'd be just as comfortable alongside Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday at the O.K. Corral.

The near left photo is of a kneeling Rick Green. At first, I thought he might be proposing to a bewildered Paul Mulvey. But that would be silly.

On second thought, it appears that he's borrowing a page from the NFL playbook: taking a knee and trying to run out the clock.


At left: That's why they call it the hot corner!

Capitals third baseman Kevin Hatcher makes this amazing catch of a sizzling line drive during the fifth inning of a game at Capital Centre.

At right: It might appear that Caps goalie Rick Tabaracci is athletically leaping out of the way of a sliding teammate.

Actually, the photo was taken during the team's "Celebration of Marionettes" night. Rick agreed to be suspended from the rafters by wires, which were manipulated by a couple of lucky fans.

In Tabaracci's long goaltending career - he played for seven NHL teams, including two different stints in Washington - he was occasionally pulled from the net; just never like this.

Tonya Harding should have been a hockey player, where whacking an opponent in the kneecap is at worst a two minute penalty.

Later in the 1994 Olympics came the memorable scene at left, where Harding is showing officials the broken lace that caused her to mess up her skating routine. Harding was allowed another chance to perform the same routine.

Less well know is that two years earlier, Capitals goalie Jim Hrivnak had the same problem. As you see, Hrivnak is showing officials how he allowed a goal because his boot was untied. Unfortunately for Jim, NHL rules don't permit "do-overs."


(Jim might deny this, by the way, especially because it's not true.)

These next two photos display a questionable and short-lived coaching strategy - attempting to confuse opponents by offering to play Leapfrog.

For the record, this could be why the Nordiques (left) and Jets (right) got disoriented and left Canada.

At first, it appears the publicity photo for Caps defenseman Gordie Lane must be a put-on - the psycho stare, and especially the swashbuckler moustache and goatee. Then it became clear. Lane, it turns out, is the hockey-playing half-brother of "Bucco Bruce", original mascot of the NFL's Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Bet those family reunions are never dull!

Now we come to the captioning Pièce de résistance. Fun-loving goalie Wayne Stephenson played charades on the bench before games. One night, he wanted everyone at Madison Square Garden to know the Capitals were headed nowhere but up in the standings. See if you can decipher his clue by Clicking Here.